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Many parents are worried about how much time our kids are spending on their screens. But a new study suggests that, to figure out how these platforms are affecting our kids, we need to focus on something else.
The amount of time kids spent on social media, mobile phones and video games wasn’t associated with more internalizing symptoms of mental health problems such as anxiety and depression, according to thestudypublished Wednesday, June 18 in JAMA, a journal of the American Medical Association. That time also wasn’t associated with more externalizing symptoms of mental health problems, such as rule breaking and aggression — or with suicidal behaviors or suicidal ideation.
What mattered was whether they were getting addicted.
Addictive use is “excessive use” that interferes with home responsibilities, schoolwork or other activities, said Yunyu Xiao, lead study author and an assistant professor in the department of population health sciences and department of psychiatry at Weill Cornell Medical College in New York. “They find a craving for it and cannot stop using it.”
Almost half the young people studied were on a high trajectory of addictive use for mobile phones, and over 40% were on a high trajectory of addictive use for video games, according to the researchers.
Kids with high or increasing use of social media and mobile phones were at two to three times greater risk for suicidal behavior and suicidal ideations than the kids on the lower trajectory, according to the study of over 4,000 US children over a period of four years. The participants were 9 or 10 years old at the start of the study.
Other concerning results include: Young people whose social media use was high or increasing also had increased risks of symptoms of mental health problems. High use of video games was associated with greater risk of symptoms of mental health problems, suicidal behaviors and suicidal ideation.
Girls were more likely than boys to have high trajectories of addictive social media use, while boys were more likely to have high trajectories of addictive video game use.
Xiao acknowledged that the results were self-reported, and the study couldn’t account for genetic or environmental factors that could have influenced the results.
The study makes clear that parents should try to help kids avoid these kinds of addictions.
“Set boundaries early on,” said Melissa Greenberg, a clinical psychologist at Princeton Psychotherapy Center in New Jersey. She was not involved in the study.
Kids should know that there are times when it’s not OK to use cell phones, video games and other technology.
She also suggested scheduling screen-free time during meals and at night so your family can wind down before bed. She recommended not allowing phones into teens’ bedrooms after a designated time each evening.
Greenberg also suggested encouraging — and, if necessary, planning — activities for teens that don’t involve screens. When I talk to parents, I tell them to let their kids hang out with their friends more. A lot of parents worry about kids’ safety when they get together in person, but it’s often far more dangerous for them to be in their bedrooms on social media, where they could connect with predators or sextortionists or simply get addicted.
Also, “model a healthy relationship with your own devices,” Greenberg said. “Parents should be mindful of their own use of devices around their kids and show them by example how to balance screen time and screen-free time.”
The Anxious Generation, a movement sparked by Jonathan Haidt’s eponymous book, ran a challengelast year, asking young people to commit to screen-free summer Fridays. Can you try doing it this summer with your kids?
This week, I’ve been speaking at training sessions for counselors at summer camps in Wisconsin and New England to try to convince them that if they put their phones away, they can have the best summer of their lives.
I point out that learning to get comfortable with ourselves and our own thoughts rather than pulling out a phone every time we have a spare moment is, unfortunately, a skill that requires practice these days. We can try it by going for walks (sans headphones), sitting and watching a sunset or lying around in a hammock. What could be more fun in the summer?
It’s also important to talk to kids about how screens can be addictive “in a nonjudgmental way,” Greenberg said. “Screens are meant to grab our attention … and social media platforms are designed to keep us going back for more. It’s important for us all to be aware of this.”
Finally, she said, parents should create device agreements with their kids, working together to decide things such as what kinds of use are acceptable and what the daily limits and consequences for breaking rules should be.
“Involve your teen in this process,” Greenberg recommended, so they understand the rationales.
Then, watch kids carefully to see whether these strategies are working. A key takeaway of the study is that “if we do not examine their addictive use,” Xiao said, “we will likely miss it.”
Signs that kids may be addicted include “compulsive use or the uncontrollable urge” to use these platforms, Greenberg said. “This may look like your teen frequently or constantly checking their phone every few minutes or turning to video games, even in situations where it’s not appropriate or where they’ve been told not to” — such as at school, late at night or when they’re doing homework.
Other signs of addiction are when kids try to reduce their use but can’t follow the limits or when they get into trouble at school or work — or even annoy friends — because they’re on their phones too much.
Kids who are addicted also may try to hide or lie about their use, then get defensive if parents ask about it, Greenberg said.
Also, “symptoms of withdrawal are a classic sign of addiction,” Greenberg warned. Kids may end up anxious, irritable, sad or angry when they don’t have access to their platforms, she said.
Another warning sign is when kids don’t fulfill their responsibilities or engage in offline activities. “This may look like teens not wanting to or feeling unable to engage in in-person interactions or feeling constantly distracted if they try,” Greenberg said. “You may notice your teen not wanting to meet up with friends in person or not fulfilling responsibilities like homework or family responsibilities.”
Finally, parents should watch out for symptoms that kids aren’t getting enough sleep. “Phone and video game addiction can lead to lack of sleep when teens stay up late on their phones or playing video games and so end up sleep deprived, which can lead to fatigue, irritability, anxiety and/or depression,” Greenberg said.
If you think your child might be addicted, try not to be judgmental, Greenberg said. Keep in mind that they probably don’t want to be addicted, and it isn’t a sign you’ve failed as a parent. The problem is these devices seem to be designed to keep us hooked.
“We need to teach them, not shame them,” she said.
Talk to your child about how they’re feeling and try to understand why they’re spending so much time on these platforms, she said. Schedule other activities and make or revise your device agreement. “If you already have one, talk through what is and is not working” and “troubleshoot,” she said.
However, if the addiction seems to be having negative consequences or to be interfering with your child’s functioning, seek help from a mental health professional, Greenberg advised.
This latest research suggests parents should worry less about the amount of time kids are spending on screens and more about whether they’re exhibiting signs of addiction.
Parents can take steps to try to prevent it. However, if kids do appear to be addicted, it’s important to get them help to avoid potentially serious outcomes.
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