Costs can spiral quickly when you’re planning for a big group and there are lots of ideas flying around. Agree on a realistic budget from the start that works for everyone, and stay within it.
Bridesmaids or the best man often lead, but if you are not organising the event, do not be afraid to speak up if something feels too expensive – others may well be thinking the same.
“Unfortunately, you’re going to need to make the dreaded WhatsApp group,” saysGeorgie Mitchell, a wedding planner. “Open communication from the start with upfront and real-time prices can help people to understand what they can afford.”
If not all the group use WhatsApp find a way to make sure they are included. For your group, for example, email or an iMessage chat may be better.
Loop in the bride or groom early too, as they will often be chipping in and will want to know that costs are not putting people off coming.
Long weekends and trips abroad have become the norm but they usually come with a hefty price tag. Accommodation, transport, meals and drinks can add up to hundreds of pounds – and that is even before the novelty T-shirts come out. According to the insurer Aviva, the average hen or stag weekend now costs £779 a person in the UK, rising to £1,208 if it takes place abroad.
Sticking to one night (or a single day) keeps things simpler, cheaper, and easier for people with children or limited time off work.
You can also plan it for “off-peak” times of the year to save money, Mitchell says. “Does it need to be a weekend in summer? Can you avoid the school holidays? The event doesn’t need to be within the few months before the wedding – find the most cost-effective dates for everyone,” she adds.
Pints in Prague may be relatively cheap, but getting there – and staying there – may not be. A night out in Brighton, a hike in the Peaks or a well-planned day locally can be just as memorable. You’ll skip the airport slog and still get a change of scene if you are trying something new.
Hosting at home is another option if someone in the group has enough space. You’ll save on venue costs, which means you can put more into decorations, games or food and still have a great night without the big spend. “What you save on accommodation can be reallocated to beautiful florals or delicious catering,”says Matilda Bea, a dinner-party planner.
If you are staying overnight, renting a large house or flat geared towards hen and stag groups can be far cheaper than hotel rooms, especially once the cost is split between everyone. It also gives you more space to hang out without having to fork out for endless rounds at bars.
When booking for a big group, check the listing for restrictions on stag or hen dos – some hosts will not allow them. Always message ahead to confirm, or use filters to avoid disappointment. For guaranteed party-friendly options in the UK, take a look at listing sites such asGroup Stays,FlockorParty Houses.
You will save more by cooking a few meals and bringing your own drinks. Think brunch ingredients, big pasta dishes or even just breakfast basics – it doesn’t have to be fancy to make a dent in costs. Agree upfront whether you will split food and drink or ask people to bring their own so no one ends up paying for something they didn’t want.
Keep in mind that you can often save by buying in bulk. For instance,Sainsbury’s Nectar holders can get up to 25% off six or more bottlesof selected wines. If anyone in your party has a Costco membership, it is worth checking out what deals they have on alcohol and food.
Pick somewhere easy to reach by public transport and consider how people will get home safely – especially for a one-day event. Booking taxis in advance or carpooling can help keep costs down and avoid chaos after a few drinks. It is worth thinking about for outings to the pub or dinner, too.
If the bride or groom is set on going overseas, try to book flights or trains as early as possible to get the cheaper tickets. But make sure to factor in the cost of getting to the airport or station, especially if it’s at an odd time or far from home.
Being flexible helps – Skyscanner’s “Everywhere” search orsavings generatorlets you compare the cheapest places to fly on your dates.
For UK stays, booking train tickets far in advance does not always guarantee savings. The cheapest advance fares typically appear onTrainlineabout 12 weeks before travel. They sell out quickly so set a reminder or sign up for an alert.
Rather than booking train tickets separately, one person could sort them all out so you can benefit from special offers. GroupSave fares are for three to nine people travelling together on off-peak or super off-peak journeys and can cut travel costs by a third. For example, a trip to Brighton from London for a weekend in mid-June costs £130.50 for three adults – or £96.54 with GroupSave.
You do not need spa days or axe throwing to have a good time. Plenty of free or cheap options – such as park picnics, karaoke, home spa nights or pub quizzes – can be just as fun. The website Hitched has a section on ideas forstagandhen dosyou can use for inspiration.
Many classic hen or stag games are easy to make yourself – the toilet paper wedding dress game needs nothing more than a few loo rolls, and DIY beer pong just takes some plastic cups, a table and a couple of ping pong balls.
While it is tempting to pack every hour with plans: brunch, games, a scavenger hunt, dinner, drinks, dancing, more does not always mean better. Giving the group some breathing room lets people have some downtime without feeling as if they’re wasting money.
If you are staying overnight, plan one or two core activities and leave the rest flexible. A bit of relaxation time often makes the main event more enjoyable.
If you have picked a theme, make decorations that stick to it, but remember they can be simple: old CDs make great disco props, cardboard cacti work for a cowboy night, and colourful card can be used to make a personalised banner.
Bea says personalised touches can help a night feel special, while being easy on the wallet. “Make your space feel special with hand-painted stationery, like “Take a shot, take a seat” signs or personalised place names. It’s budget-friendly, thoughtful, and instantly sets the tone”. For her own birthday dinner, Bea put the idea into action withpersonalised gift bags for guests and handmade menus.
Not everyone wants the matching T-shirt, the massage, or the cocktail-making session. Mitchell recommends building flexibility into your plans so people can join for part of the day or skip bits without feeling awkward.
She says: “Can some guests join for one day? Can they opt out of the expensive activity? Giving options helps match everyone’s budget.”
You can make this clear early on with a rough breakdown of what’s essential and what’s optional. That way, people on tighter budgets can still join in without being hit by a £200 all-in-one invoice. A quick poll in the group chat helps work out who is in for which parts – and keeps things fair from the start.
Streamline the planning – and cut the cost – by hosting a joint stag and hen do (yes, a “sten do”). It is a break from tradition, but if the couple are keen, a “sten” makes financial sense: accommodation, food and drink can all be shared, and bigger groups often unlock better discounts, says Bea.
“You don’t have to spend the entire time together, but combining forces for one big night – especially if you’re heading abroad or booking a special experience – can cut costs while doubling the fun.”
If, for example, you and your partner would otherwise be going to separate events, you might cut costs by sharing a room.
It also gives the wedding party a chance to meet before the big day. You do not have to do everything together. Separate nights out or activities work fine, but sharing a base could keep things simple and cheaper.